looking for my angel
by iamsherlocked89
Summary: My first try at fanfiction so please be nice to me. Castiel meets Paige, a 16 year old girl who runs away from home. This girl pulls the human side of Castiel out. There is more to Paige then she even knows and when when she meets Castel it starts a whole new battle then what she is use to.
1. Chapter 1

This so mostly so people understand my story "looking for my Angel"  
The story is about a 16 year old girl whom at the age of 5 lost her mother to what she was told was a car accident. Sense around the age of 8 her father  
started drinking and soon became both physically and sexually abusive. When she was around 13 she started to self harm to deal with all the pain in her life, now enter Castiel.  
Castiel was assigned to paige 4 months ago (before she ran away). He has watched over her as her guardian angel but has been unknown to her do to orders not to intervene till the night she decided  
to run.


	2. Chapter 2

Castiel's gaze watched as his charge left her home with only one intention in mind… escaping. It had been four months since Castiel had been  
assigned to this human, he had watched her daily life day after day and soon would come a time were she would need a helping hand, some one to tell  
her she wasn't alone in this world that humans had inhabited. From what he had seen and others like it, above everything else she had risen above her  
adversities in wanting to become something better, dreaming of having more then she was entitled to and Castiel was here to help her every step of  
the way until the time came were she was able to look at the world with new eyes and see she was better then what fate had dealt her no matter how  
long it took. For some cases it could mean a life time, for others only months just depending on the person.

Most of the world was still asleep so early in the morning as Castiel followed soundlessly behind Paige, his tan trench coat slightly flowing with each step  
he took. The only light to assist her was the moon's ere glow, not even its rays could have spotted the potential danger of the thugs around the corner,  
the druggies in the alley way, or every other shady person Castiel could sense. He could nearly feel her concern, fighting the feeling to look over one's  
shoulder, or even the worry that tried to be shrugged off. Instead that is why Castiel was here.

Paige tried to think of what she was suppose to do now that she had nowhere to didn't notice a movement to the left of her till a man grabbed her  
"Ya baby" he took her bag ,then looked her up and down"your a hot piece of ass" he started grabbing at her ass,she tried to fight him off but he was twice  
her kicked him but he kept a firm hold on her arm "you bitch!" he he yelled and slapped her she screamed in pain as he tried taking her shirt off,she started  
to cry not knowing how to get this guy off her

The moment of calm had finally ended when a man came from the darkness of the alley towards Paige. Castiel was forced to hold back until the slap that  
seemed to echo threw the quiet parking lot came in contact with the delicate face. Making his presence known with just a thought his graveled voice  
was deadly. "Let her go." Castiel strode forward until he was less then a few steps away, his blue eyes shifted to look at Paige as if to send out a silent  
comfort before looking to the man. "I will not ask again."  
Paige looked into the eyes of other man hoping he could help her some man holding her left her go and Paige stumbled walk in his face  
"Why do you just mind your own business" Paige stood there in fear watching these two guys stare at each mind told her to run but she  
couldn't move

Castiel didn't move nor was he intimidated by this man. Paige was out of his grasp and that was all of his concern, now he had to deal with the physical  
aspect of the situation that humans always insisted on to show their supremacy. "She is my business." Castiel stated his monotone voice didn't change  
despite the anger he felt at the moment. Another human emotion he had picked up from staying with them for so long at times and this man was no  
different then the ordinary thugs that liked to harm others just for pure joy. And it was something Castiel would rectify.

The man shoved him  
"look just get the fuck out of here before i have to kick your scrawny ass"he started to get in his face again.  
Paige started to panic,she had no clue what to do and this new guy seemed almost unfazed by any of wanted to grab her bag and run but it was  
right behind her attacker and she didn't want to get any closer to him

At the man's shove Castiel stood rooted to the spot. For any one he looked like a average, regular business accountant or something of the sort but  
this was getting frustrating real quick. This man wasn't leaving without Paige and it would be something Castiel would never allow, instead bringing two  
fingers to touch the man's forehead the thug dropped like a bag of rocks, collapsing to the ground. Tilting his head Castiel merely stepped over the man  
and grabbed the fallen bag to hand it to Paige. He looked at the red mark on her cheek, making what Castiel did less then what the man deserved. "Are  
you alright?"

Paige stood there froze "what just happened?" she pointed to the guy on the ground "is he dead? what did you do to him?"she took her bag from him  
but didn't move from where she stood could hear the panic in her voice and tried to calm herself but to much had just happened that she  
could not wrap her mind was still crying and she couldn't stop herself

Castiel said nothing for a long while as if debating when in truth how could he explain what he had done, if he had wanted he couldn't have not  
answered any question and just disappeared before her eyes but something pulled at him to stay. It was something he had never felt before in all of his  
three hundred years with human contact. So instead he stayed. "He is alive." Castile's monotone voice held no expression to weather he cared if the  
man was alive and well or not. Truth to be told he deserved a lot more then what he got and he should walk away happy. But now he had a terrified  
charge on his hands in need of answers. Looking up toward the heavens Castiel took a breath before his sapphire stare met hers. "Your safe now, Paige."

Paige looked into his eyes they were so Beautiful she almost forgot what had just shoke her head then said "wait how do you know  
my name?" she started to feel scared again and backed up a little .

Castiel watched as relief turn into fear again. "Don't be afraid, I am here to protect you." It was not yet necessary to tell Paige who and what he was  
just yet. Regardless of if she ran no mater were he would be able to find her but here and now was not the place to talk. Instead Castiel started to walk  
down the street away from the man and eyes that had now since them followed them only to pause and look over his shoulder toward Paige. "Are you  
coming?"

Paige watch him started to walk away,when he asked her if she was coming she wasn't sure what to do but thought it would be a better idea to fallow  
him then walk down these streets fallowed him but staying right behind him "where are we going?" she said looking around making sure no  
one else was fallowing them as they walked she looked at him, he looked like some accountant or maybe a cop "oh god please don't tell me your  
a cop" she was sure if he was a cop he was going to take her home and she couldn't let that happen

"Somewhere safe." Was Castiel's only response to her question. His eyes scanned the road, along with alley ways there was so much life on earth, it  
saddened him to see what some humans had done to such a precious gift. But humans also intrigued him, some had the faith of a saint and the hope  
that something would change and everything would be as it should, those were the one's that made Castiel have faith in man. "I am not a cop."  
Answering the second question that had brought him out of his thoughts rather quickly.

From up the street Castiel saw his destination, the lights of the church seemed to brighten the whole street with a warm inviting light. The church had  
been around for longer then most humans could remember it was old but still held a place of great spirit. In over a hundred years the place had not  
changed. Standing on the steps Castiel looked up only to look back at Paige. "You will be safe here until the sun rises, your father will be looking for you  
when he awakes."

Paige stopped and looked up at the church then looked back at him suddenly "but i can't let him find me" she looked at him with panic "he can't find me!  
you don't understand he'll..." she didn't finish her sentence she started to look around thinking maybe it was time to bail on this guy.

"I wont allow that." Castiel said before she could say anything else as he looked around so far the only one who had seen them was the man who was  
no laying unconscious a block up the road and he wasn't going to be alerting the authorities any time soon. "You need rest, and it will be easier to travel  
during the day. When the sun rises in two hours time I will find you." Leaving the door to the church open for her. With a the sound of flapping wings  
Paige was left alone.


	3. Chapter 3

Two hours later just as Castiel had promised the doors to the church opened and Castiel entered he had bought some time for them on the journey they  
were about to undergo. The phones to the father's house had been inoperative due to a freak lighting storm that had struck the telephone pole outside  
their home and the man wouldn't get up until later tonight giving them a full day's travel. "Paige?" he called softly.

Paige looked around for him but he had so how just disappeared so he entered the church and looked around it was really hadn't been to a  
church sense her mother was didn't see anyone so she sat on one of the pew's she put her bag next to her and pulled out her longer  
yawned and pushed her bag away and laid down on it like a pillow and covered herself with her had a lot of nightmares mostly about her  
father coming in here and grabbing her

When she her a man's voice she jumped up in fear and looked was the same man from last night so she calmed down  
"I'm here" she said still sounding tho she had slept the dreams kept her on edge,she put here coat back in her bag and went to him.  
She stop right in front of him "before you say anything i want to know who you are and why you seem to know me?"

Castiel's gaze turned to her, taking a few steps to close the gap between them. Before he could have said anything Paige had some questions of her  
own that Castiel could not answer just yet under his orders. "I am Castiel, everything else will be known in time. We need to leave." Turning from her he  
started for the door.

Paige fallowed him to the doors and how outside"Castiel thats an interesting name" she said fallowing him down the step "so Castiel where are we go,  
another church?" she pulled her bag off as they walked and she pulled the jacket off she had worn when she left the she got it off she noticed  
she forget to put her wrist bands on and hurried to pull them out her bag and slip them hoped that he had not noticed her scars,she didn't want  
to have to explain them to him.

Castiel glanced at Paige at the mention of his name being interesting, he had never gave it much thought, it was merely a name. "Where we go is up to  
you, I am only here to protect you on your journey." His graveled voice held no hint of emotion, the sudden movement caused Castiel to glance over  
only to see Paige covering up the cuts on her forearms. "You are not hiding anything that I have not already seen…" Or known about for that matter  
but he wasn't going to explain further. The scars on her wrists, some looked years old while others were less then a day. It was interesting to see how  
humans dealt with their emotions, instead of turning to God, they turn to a razor, thinking the shed blood and pain will make everything better.

Paige awkwardly pulled at her wrist bands feeling stupid,then walked up next to him as they still head down the street,she looked at him oddly  
"What are you talking about? *my journey* "she guy seemed like he only spoke in riddles and it was starting to get let it pass  
and continued "I'm not really sure where to go,i don't have much money on me.." she rolled her eyes "I did not plan this very well" she said out loud to  
thought about something "i think i can get one of those crappy motels but if i do that you have to answer my questions when we get there"  
she gave him a serous look "no more riddles and if you do that weird disappearing thing then i'm leaving"

After the long line of questions Castiel pondered her motivations for running away, before coming to a conclusion that it would be in both of their best  
interests that she knew the truth but on the other hand how would she truly understand her predicament. "We have a common goal…" He started.  
"And that is to stay as far away from your father as we can. In the mean time you will have to learn to have faith that a higher power then even you  
can realize is watching over you." There was a long pause for the moment before Castiel reluctantly gave in. "Once we find a place for the night, I will  
answer all of your questions… at the moment there was a strange gurgling sound that made Castiel stop dead in his tracks and look at her. Hear the  
sound again his head tilted and his eyes drifted to her stomach. "You need nourishment." More of a statement then a actual question.

She never even realized she was hungry till now,to much had been on her mind to really think about smiled at him "i did prepare for that".She  
pulled a bag of chips out of her bag and started to open knew he was watching her "this might not be healthy but its food and free" she ate her  
chips as she walked with him "If there was a *higher power* that was watching over me then why would he let..."she stopped for a second not really  
sure how to say it but just decided to be blunt "why would he have let my dad rape me and beat me" she started to get tears in her eyes "why would  
he take my mother from me when i needed her the most!" she noticed she had started to shout and other people passing were staring at just  
pointed up the road "there's a motel around the corner its next to the liquor store" she stated flatly.

Continuing to walk what happened next Castiel had never expected. The sudden emotional eruption of Paige caused him to stop dead in his tracks  
ignoring the looks and stares that were being cast their way. Even seeing hear tears, her rising voice Castiel's own features stayed the same unchanging  
and unemotional stare. After she was done and pointed toward the rather rundown hotel Castiel didn't even bother to look as he glanced down at her  
due to the height difference. "The lord works in mysterious ways, I do not question his plans." It seemed to be a moment of awkward silence between  
them, all the while Castiel felt something he had never experienced before, was it sympathy for her? Clearing his thoughts and getting back on track he  
motioned to the hotel. "You will need a room for the night, and then we will discuss were you go from here."

Paige rolled her eyes"I don't mean to be rude to you but the lords mysterious ways are fucked up " she said bitterly walking toward the wasn't  
the nicest place in town but with little money she had no they got closer she put her bag strap around her neck like people always said to do  
to avoid having it snatched from stopped outside the reservation office and turn to Castiel "I don't think they would give me a room cause i'm  
underage if i give you the money can you do it?"she went in her bag and pulled out her money "It should only be fifty"

Castiel stayed rooted to the spot as if someone had doused him in a bucket of ice water. Her words echoed in his mind, even from earlier why had god  
not stepped in? Taken any action against the life this girl was leading. Doubt, it was a strange feeling. Shaking it off he continued, walking beside her  
only to remain quiet as if deep in thought. Reaching the hotel that looked more run down then it had from a distance Castiel had a better idea then  
taking her money.

From what he could sense on the second floor, room number 23 was open and had been for some time. His gaze traveled to the receptionist before  
gently placing a hand on Paige's shoulder. "Room Twenty three, the room is open stay there until I return." Castiel had his doubts on if she trusted him  
but it seemed he would find out. Taking a step back there was a sudden gust of a light wind before Castiel was no were to be seen.

Paige stood there for a minuet after Castiel left *whats he doing breaking us in?* she started walking looking for the room,when she finally  
found it she grabbed the door thought it was going to be locked but he was right it was went inside and looked around making sure  
no one was already in tossed her bag on a chair and sat down on the was tired but didn't want to sleep yet so she took some clothes  
out of her bag and went to the took a quick shower and got dressed,she put her wrist band back on even tho he said he had already  
knew about the cuts and scar's she still wasn't going to have them on display. Finally done she walked back into the room,he still was not here so she  
grabbed the remote to the small tv and turned it paid no real attention to the tv all she could think about was the questions she had for him.


	4. Chapter 4

A strong wind whipped around Castiel's form, as he gazed out at Flathead lake in Northwest Montana. There was no use in delaying the inevitable even  
now as Castiel stood on the highest peak surrounding the waters below. Raising a subtle hand the wind calmed as if by command. His gaze shifted from  
the waters glassy surface to the heavens slightly feeling home sick. In his mind he sent out a silent calling only for it to be answered less then a second  
later hearing the tell tale sign of flapping wings.

"You called, Castiel?"

Castiel didn't even bother to turn around once he heard the voice, Alison one of Gabriel's high commanders had come to pay him a visit it seemed.  
"Why had Paige's previous guardian failed to significantly protect her?" His voice was a graveled monotone that seemed to be more disconcerted then  
usual, in doing this he knew he was poking a sleeping bear but he had to know… for his own sanity.

"Paige? Are you on first name basses with it?"

At that Castiel whipped around his features turned hard as stone. "It, Is a human being." He nearly snapped only to catch his tone at the last possible  
moment.

"Why do you inquire such information? It has no value in your task now."

"I wish to know."

"That is not an acceptable answer, Castiel."

"It will have to be."

There was a long moment of silence and Castiel feared that Alison would not give the answers he sought until she walked  
forward closing the large gap that seemed to separate them. She was his superior, his older sister, his family just as  
all the rest of his brothers and sisters and like her they all had a habit of speaking in riddles.

"She would have never been burdened with weight that she could not carry… I warn you Castiel do not get too attached to your  
charge."

Right before his eyes she disappeared and the wind seemed to have picked up to its full strength once again leaving  
Castiel with more questions then answers. But what Alison had said, not to get attached was that a warning for the  
future? Something about how she said it caused him to shift uncomfortably but knowing he should get back to Paige…

There was the sound of wing beats and a light wind fill the motel room that sent several loose papers flying threw  
the air as Castiel stood on the opposite side of the room, farthest from the door. In one hand he held a white back that  
read 'White Castle' on the front. After making a pit stop in grabbing some one else's order he had placed it on the table  
he looked around the small room before noting that everything was still in place, no one would bother them tonight. In  
the minds of all except he and Paige there was no room 23 at this motel. Wondering around the room his eyes seemed to  
meet a bewildered Paige.

She turned the tv off and look at him  
"So you did return...i wasn't sure you would" She stood up and walked closer to him "so do i get to ask my questions and  
get a real answer now or are you just going to give me more of your riddles?"She gave him a steady look waiting to hear  
what he would hoped he would give her some answers or she was going to do what she said earlier and leave.

Castiel wasn't sure if he was ready to answer the questions that Paige was going to ask. In the farthest corner of his  
mind he was dreading this confrontation but knew it was either now or later. He could refuse to answer and she would  
leave and sooner or later her father would catch up to her and he would be there in the shadows, helpless to do anything  
about it or answer her questions and then face the wrath that would fall upon him.

His eyes watched her as she moved closer to him only to feel the weight of the decision fall onto him. It was his choice  
in the end and he was sure he was going to regret it. Moving to the low sitting bookshelf he leaned against its smooth  
surface his fingers running over the cover of the old bible that rested there. "No mater were you are…" He started his  
eyes dared not meet hers. "I will always find you." It was more of a statement for her to think about before giving her a  
small nod as if to ask her questions.

Paige nodded and sighed happy to be able to ask her questions cause she didn't want to have to leave because he had helped  
her out "I'm not trying to be a brat to you Castiel ,i'm happy you've helped me this far i just need to know a few  
things" She moved to a chair and turned it to face where he was standing and sat down "Well here is one question how would  
you know where i was if i did just leave? and how do you seem to know so much about me when i've never seen you before?  
she looked at him waiting on his answers,he seemed reluctant to answer but she hoped he started to mess with her  
necklace,it was a cross but she only wore it because it belonged to her mother' had lost her faith a long time ago.

Castiel thought for a moment as if there was a way out of telling her the direct truth but in the end all of his thoughts  
failed and his brilliant blue eyes looked to her. "You are my charge… it is my duty to protect you at any and all costs."  
There was a moments pause as Castiel walked around already feeling a slight jittery feeling as if he couldn't stay still.  
But he stayed within Paige's line of sight. As for the second question Castiel was unsure to answer so he stayed quiet.

She was confused "Charge? what does that mean?... your starting to sound like so type of body guard?"She watched him moved  
around looking a little started to feel annoyed because it felt like he was hiding something important from her.  
She tried hide her aggravation "look i need you to tell me whats going on.I'm not 5...please just tell me how do you know  
me?" she stood up and looked at him "if you can't answer that then really how do you expect me to trust you "

Castiel suddenly whirled on her, his eyes seemed to bore into the depths of her very soul rather then looking at her  
corporeal form. "How are you suppose to believe me when you have so little faith?" He questioned back as he took a breath  
knowing what he had to do. The room suddenly grew dark from the clouds that suddenly appeared in the sky, they formed a  
grey over cast when the weather that morning had called for clear skies all day. Electronics came on without being touched,  
the television turned to static as the picture distorted the radio was nothing but high pitch noise.

"That's the problem with you Paige, you have no faith." Lighting suddenly lit up the room from the flash out side the  
window and Castiel's form grew not in size but shape. With another flash of lighting that seemed even more closer now  
black shadows of wings lined the hotel walls as Castiel stood there unmoving. "I am an angel of the lord." He spoke just  
as his wings came to their full glory, within a moment they were gone, the electronics were back to normal and even the  
sky had cleared. Leaving Castiel and Paige with the aftermath.

"An angel " she said quietly after seeing the wings and then watching them disappear. She kinda stood there is shock just  
looking at him,she knew he was odd but didn't expect him to be an thought about all the things he said before  
about having to protect her and how he always would know where she pushed her shock to the side for a second  
and thought about something,she started to feel angry again "Ok your an Angel from god here to protect me...i can  
understand that part" she started to pace around "and your job is protect me...where were you when i was being BEATEN!  
and RAPED! by my dad" she stop pacing and stood right in front of him "you say i have no faith but after everything that  
has happened to me why should i? Why should i have faith in a god that would let these things happen Castiel"Paige could  
feel herself shaking and starting to tear looked down at her hands which were balled into fist,she wasn't going to  
let him see her cry. *stop being a baby* she took a deep breathe and stop herself from crying,she wiped her  
eyes real quick and looked at him to see if he would even answer or say anything at all.

Castiel waited for it the shock, the fear, but as he watched her then he saw something he didn't expect and that was the  
anger. There had been many people that were worse off then Paige and still contained a morsel of fate but for her he  
couldn't answer her questions for he had asked the same thing and had received only a riddled answer. After she had  
calmed Castiel had not moved a inch from his place near the wall. In a decision he decided to tell her just as he had  
been told. "Some things happen for a reason that cannot be changed even by angels. I sought to find the answers to the  
questions you asked and I cannot tell you why your guardian did not significantly protect you…"

There was a long pause on Castiel's part as if he was too ashamed to look at her. His gaze looked toward the light  
streaming from the holes in the curtained window as he spoke. "Angels can only do as they are ordered… four months ago I  
was assigned to you and ever since I have been by your side to the days you cried yourself to sleep I was there  
whispering comfort, to the nights you closed yourself away and picked up that razor…" Castiel's sapphire blue eyes finally  
dared to meet her gaze. "I shared your pain, And after the pain your father inflicted I soothed your mind and body…  
and when you decided to run it was my time to make my presence known to you… anything more would have been breaking my  
orders." Castiel hoped it would have been enough to satisfy her questions even now seeing her fight so hard to hide the  
tears she so desperately wanted to shed in the back of Castiel's mind he asked himself was it truly worth it?

"So your ordered to watch but not intervene...but your suppose to also protect" she gave him an annoyed look "How does  
that make sense Castiel?" She looked at him and remembers his words about sharing her pain ,she walled over to the bed,  
sat down and put her head in her hands.  
"I'm sorry to act so ungrateful i just don't understand"she said through her hand "What was the reason for any of it?"she  
finally let herself cry,it was quiet but you can tell by the way she was shaking

Castiel looked toward the heavens before his gaze followed her to the bed. Of coarse she wouldn't understand, but how was  
he to explain? Castiel's gaze was drawn a ugly painting on the wall as his mind spun with thoughts and questions.  
"Angels follow orders Paige, I'm no different. You or I may not understand his plans but we must have faith to trust unto  
him." Looking over he saw her body shake with the flood of emotion she had been trying to hold back for so long. Walking  
over to the bed Castiel sat looking straight ahead only to place a light hand on her shoulder. Even then he truly didn't  
know how to comfort such a being.

Before he had been assigned to Paige everything had been so simple, there was no question of loyalties, to fragments of  
doubt only now that's all there was, questions and doubt if he was truly doing the right thing or had been all along…

Paige lifted her head "I don't think i can trust a god that would let the things that have happened,happen" she whispered.  
She wiped her eyes and looked at him "I'm not sure if you know but my mom believed...she had same god she  
believed in took her from me then not long after is when it all started" she then looked straight a head "I think if god  
would have let her stay things would not have happened like they did "  
Paige thought for a minuet "How can you fallow orders like that? I mean to just watch and do nothing?"

Castiel was quiet for a long time, his hand slipped from Paige's shoulder only to fall in his lap with his other hand as  
they folded loosely. Looking over at Paige his graveled voice seemed more grave then before. "You must understand something  
… I am not human. I was created for one purpose and that was to serve." he waited for a moment before continuing even as  
he spoke he felt as if he was betraying her for a reason unknown. "Human emotions and free will was something I was not  
given." Castiel looked to his hands which had not moved since he had placed them there. He remembered when had first been  
sent to earth, taking over his vessel to touch, and see through a human's eyes was something that was nearly overpowering  
but over time he saw as an angel, having to separate himself from those he protected. "If you cannot trust in god… trust  
in me."

Paige looked back at him " I knew you were odd with how you act emotional,kinda like a robot"  
she looked back down just thinking about everything,it was quiet for awhile before she finally looked at him  
"...I'll trust you " she said in a near whisper surprised herself never trusted anyone but she had a feeling she could  
trust sat there in silence for a long time before she said something "So whats the plan? I'm i just going to be  
hiding out here or is there something i need to do?"


	5. Chapter 5

In the silence Castiel's mind drifted back to the meeting with Alison, her words about not getting too close to his charge  
but at the moment it felt impossible not to. What he felt for her was something new even for him, even at this moment he  
wasn't sure what it was. A voice broke through the haze of thoughts, what was she to do? She was the one who ran, it was  
up to her and for him to follow. "Your journey is your own Paige, I cannot dictate were you go from here. Were you go I  
will follow." Standing from the bed Castiel walked to the window and glanced out as he spoke. "You are safe here for the  
time being, but I cannot shield this place for too much longer. You can stay here for the night and we will leave in the  
morning…"

"Ok well my plan is to get the hell out of town or even better this state but its going to be hard" she said frankly.  
She watched him look out the window,then she yawned  
"I'm sorry but i need to go to sleep or something" after she said that she thought of another question "do you sleep?  
sorry if that's a stupid question but i was just wondering?"

Castiel glanced over at the mention of her getting out of the state. It was going to be difficult especially now the  
authorities had send her photo to every department along state lines, an amber alert had been sent out the previous  
morning after her father had awoken from his drunken state and now they were dealing with a man that they couldn't track  
and Castiel would be threatened to expose himself. His eyes glanced to the chair before taking a seat as he shook his head.  
"I do not require sleep… I will just sit quietly while you rest." His eyes glanced to her then away again rather rapidly  
as if trying not to look at her since there was nothing else of interest in the room.

Castiel didn't mind her sleeping, it was the only time she looked peaceful, despite the nightmares she sometimes held that  
would cause her to awake in the middle of the night clutching her blanket for dear life. How many times had he wanted to  
make himself known only to have been hindered by his orders? He might have been heading for trouble from his superiors  
but in his eyes it was worth it.

Paige yawned again "you can watch the tv if you want it won't bother me,i just don't want you to be bored"  
She got up from the bed and pulled the blanket up and laid down covering herself "good night i guess".It felt weird having  
him sit there but she also felt safer then she had been in awhile.

"Pleasant dreams." Castiel spoke back with a nod only to stare out into space, her invitation to 'watch t.v' was rather  
tempting if only he knew how to turn the thing on. Looking at the remote Castiel moved soundlessly as he suddenly appeared  
on the foot of the bed, sitting to the far corner careful not to make his presence known to the sleeping human. Looking  
at the remote with all of its mechanism he had no clue were to even start. He pushed a button only for it to do nothing,  
trying another still nothing. Getting a little flustered, he set the remote back in his lap as if thinking for a moment as  
he glanced over his shoulder toward Paige then back to the T.V, with a wave of his hand there was suddenly silent static  
before a picture could be seen.

There was no sound only the soft glow that illuminated the small room, and what Castiel saw made him sit up a little  
straighter. His head tilted trying to figure out what in the world the two on the T.V were doing exactly with the woman  
wearing a rather reviling outfit presumably the baby sitter and the other a pizza man. Half a hour into it the t.v flicked  
off only leave Castiel with more questions he would have to ask Paige in the morning, if the pizza man truly loved the  
baby sitter why did he keep slapping her rear?…. Maybe she had done something bad? With another whisper of wind Castiel  
stood next to Paige looking down at her still form, without thinking he lent down and pulled the covers closer to her  
before taking his original seat by the window. He wasn't quite sure why he had done it but it seemed the thing to do in  
fear of her being cold, that was his only rationalization.

Paige started to toss and turn,her dreams were filled with images of her Dad finding her and beating or raping her.  
They caused her to start to cry in her tried to wake up but she couldn't ,She finally forced herself and almost  
jumped out of bed looking around sure her father would be to just see Castiel "sorry" she said threw deep  
breathes still freaked sat back down feeling kinda stupid,she thought about hiding in the bathroom out of his  
eye sight and knew it was stupid but that's just how she had learned to deal with things.

Castiel was sitting quietly, unsure of how much time had passed between the time he had gotten rather bored with T.V and  
now. From the corner of his eye he saw her shifting before suddenly jumping up as if something had caused her to do so.  
For a moment he was hesitant to offer aid but she needed him…

Arising from his chair he walked over to the side of the bed only to kneel down, placing a finger over his lips as if to  
quiet her. Taking her hand in his he could feel the warmth radiating off of the small hand. It was so smooth to the touch  
he allowed his fingers to caress the skin as if it would break beneath his grasp. "Focus on my touch… and know you are  
not alone." His voice was no more then a whisper, and his eyes stayed focused on her hand as he traced soothing patterns  
on her surface. "You are safe…"

Paige closed her eyes focusing on his touch "i'm okay,it's okay" she kept whispering to herself over and over till she  
calmed awhile she opened her eyes to look at him "I'm sorry...you understand right?" she said just  
looked at him feeling bad that she had let just a nightmare make her act like she did.

Castiel stayed by her side, his hands tracing Enochian symbols until he felt her mind and body sooth. When he felt her  
shift Castiel's eyes rose to meet Paige's. The truth was he didn't understand, he could never understand but something in  
him caused him to nod slowly. "Rest Paige… when you awake I will be here." His hand slowly slipped from hers, still  
feeling the warmth from her hand. He didn't go far, bringing the chair even closer to the bed just to be closer in case  
she needed him again, this was a first step from taking her away from the blade of a razor.

Paige watched him pull his chair closer to her bed,she smiled weakly at him before laying back took awhile for  
her to fall back to sleep but this time it was better,it was a calm dreamless had pulled the pillow from next to  
her and hugged it to her.

Castiel sat near her through the rest of the night, her sleep seemed to be pleasant just the way he had hoped for. His mind  
slightly touched hers keeping the dark thoughts of the human's subconscious from revealing its self. The dark room changed  
from a ere surrounding to a warm state. The birds outside were singing, the sun was high in the sky… and a police officer  
was knocking at the door…


	6. Chapter 6

Castiel had lost the ability to cloak the room a half hour ago, he had not wanted to awake Paige but now it looked as if  
he would pay for the mistake. Looking to Paige to see how to handle this … human reinforcement.

Paige woke up when she heard the knocks at the looked to Castiel with panic and whispered  
"who is it...please tell me its not him" she got off the bed quietly and went to the window and peeked was a  
cop car right outside  
"shit" she whispered and back up toward the knew they were there for her someone must have saw her yesterday and  
called the cops  
"What am i going to do.i-i-i can't go back there Cas, i can't"she whispered threw tears

Castiel could feel her panic as he looked around trying to clear his mind only to be interrupted by another knock.  
'This is the police, we just want to ask you a few questions…' Castiel's head tilted at the sound of slightly clicking,  
unknowing at the time that the sound was actually a gun being pulled from it's holster instinctively Castiel placed  
himself in front of Paige.

"I-I-I can't go back there Cas, I can't…

He could hear the fear edge Paige's voice, he was not to interfere even now in his mind he could hear Alison's voice like  
a low warning.

"Remember your place Castiel…"

With a low shake of his head he turned to Paige. "Gather your things." He said quietly as the door rattled again.  
"Open up, this is the last warning." The voice seemed angered and from the outside, they backed up just before they were  
about to the door suddenly brown from It's hinges knocking both cops back and over the railing. There was a few other  
cops in the parking lot that instantly drew their weapons. "Come out with your hands up or we'll shoot." Castiel looked  
to the window on the back side of the hotel room, going to it he looked down, it was a good five story drop, within a  
blink he stood on the street below. "Paige, Jump." His voice still even lined.

Paige hurried grabbed her bag and look out the took one look at the door seeing cops starting to rush in and  
jumped.

The rest of the back up rushed in, their guns aimed to fire. "Freeze! No!" They ran forward as they saw the figure jump  
from the window. Down below Castiel's arms opened, catching Paige with no effort. Already he could feel the winds change,  
anger from his superiors but at the moment he couldn't care less as he set her down only to look up at the dumbfounded  
faces before they disappeared and they were coming after him.

"Suspects considered armed and dangerous, take appropriate action…." The police scanners spewed as the police team rounded  
the corner seeing the couple in their sights.

Castiel took Paige's hand and ran, his glance looking behind him before he stopped whirled around looking to the sky  
before turning to Paige. "Keep going!" His voice seemed to have raised as the sky began to over cast, the atmosphere  
changed to something darker.

A cop had taken a hidden pathway, seeing a woman run past he began the chase. "Stop right there!" he called after her.

She looked at Castiel but then started running again,Paige heard the cop but didn't stop running in fact she tried to run  
the office was faster then her and had tackle her to the tried fighting to escape "Stop resisting!  
Stop resisting!"the cop keep yelling at her pulling her arms behind her "Get the fuck off me! please don't do this" she  
screamed at cop wasn't listen to Paige and his hold on her arms was hurting her."Please stop! that hurts" she  
mind was racing with fear and panic *this is it i'm going back* she thought in her head and started to cry

The ground shook as the police front lined Castiel. "Get on the ground!" Cas only looked at the weapons and the figures  
before a gesture from his hand and the large oak uprooted and fell in front of them, causing the line of police to  
scramble back to get out of the way.

"Get the fuck off me!"

Castiel's head whipped around only to see nothing, with a flutter of wings he was gone.

"Please stop! that hurts"

Having got one hand cuff around the squirming girl's wrist, the officer was oblivious to the rather stoned faced man  
coming up from behind him until he felt a hand grip around the back of his neck and the sudden, violent jerk backward.  
There was a hard thud as the cop hit the ground looking up as he fought the gain the wind that had been lost. Castiel  
tilted his head stepping forward just as the officer pulled his gun and fired there was a sudden jolt and Castiel looked  
down to see blood welling to the surface of the pure white shirt. His finger tips touched the crimson, rubbing it between  
his fingers slightly before looking back at the officer. The gun ripped from his hand and came straight into Castiel's.  
The sound of crunching metal could he heard before he dropped the now deformed object in to the dirt. "You will not harm  
her." Was his only words before the Cop's hands shot to his throat as if he was choking.

Paige jumped to her feet as soon as the cop was off watch Castiel get shot and she excepted him to drop to the  
ground but it didn't seem to even faze she saw the crush gun and saw the cop choking  
"Cas stop! you can do that" she yelled and grabbed his arm "Whatever your doing to him you have to stop,if you kill a cop  
things will only get worse"She looked around "We gotta get out of here NOW im sure they already called for back up"

Castiel watched in morbid fascination, the man's red face as he gasped for breath. He had seen man die before only now by  
his hand there was a sudden thrill to it that he couldn't explain. He could feel the sticky texture of the blood that  
clung to his shirt from the wound that stopped bleeding for the past minuet. From the moment Paige gripped his arm his  
gazed turned to her searching for a explanation of why he wasn't allowed to kill this man who had tried to hurt her,  
this was his job to protect….

The cop suddenly inhaled sharply as if taking his first breath of life, coughing and sputtering the cop collapsed in a  
exhausted heap. Castiel could hear the others coming just as Paige had predicted, backing away he followed her as they  
ran from the sight.


	7. Chapter 7

Paige grabbed his hand and ran down the road trying to think of a place to hide till the cops would remembered  
and old shut down factor not far from keep looking behind her seeing if another cop had fallowed,it looked clear  
for now but you could still hear the ran toward the railroad tracks and pointed head at the large old building  
"look we can hide there for now" she pulled him toward the building and forced the door open,once they were inside she  
slammed in closed and lean against it "im not sure how safe this place is but it should work till we're sure their gone"  
her heart was racing and she was breathing heavy,she was feeling a little dizzy but she was ok.

Castiel followed Paige, every time she would look behind her he would as well only to see nothing. The old abandoned  
factory looked like a useful place to take shelter, it was large and one of the many places that the cops would have to  
search but there was something to their advantage, in the eyes of the humans passing there was no building, only an open  
field. Once safely inside Castiel assessed the situation. He could only hear the hard breathing making him glance over at  
Paige. "Are you alright?" His voice was rather quiet as he stepped closer to her looking at the handcuff still attached to  
her wrist. With a gesture of his hand there was a slight click and the metal hit the ground.

Paige started to calm down her breathing and rubbed at her wrist that was now free "I'm fine" she said not looking at couldn't look at him because truthfully she wasn't sure if she was just happened scared the crap out of her,it brought back memories plus now she knew every cop in the state was looking for her and him. Then she remembered Castiel's gun shot wound "are you ok? you were shot" she said with concern.

Castiel stepped away from her, his sapphire blue gaze looked around the abandoned place.  
There was something that unsettled him even when he knew they were not able to be found. At the mention of him being shot  
he turned to face her only to look down at his abdomen. "Mortal weapons cannot kill me." He said flatly. For how long they were going to wait there he had no clue but this was the first encounter they had had with the authorities it would have been nice to hear what they had been saying…

Taking the advantage and sifting through the debris, Castiel found what he was looking for. A old run down tv that looked  
like the last time it was played was back in the 60's. Propping it up it suddenly turned on to the news that was all ready spinning the story saying Paige had linked up with a terrorist along with showing the door that had thrown two officers over the railing. The screen was suddenly filled with Paige and a sketch of his own face within the county this would make It a little more difficult to get out of the state. Castiel had seen enough, his hand left the old television and went dormant again looking to Paige. Looks like tonight they would remain here and already there was a chill in the air.

Paige just nodded "well good to know you can't really die" then she looked at the tv that Castiel had just stood  
there shocked at what she saw,her face and drawings of his plastered all over the the tv went off She looked at him "Damn it!now its going to be a full on man not going to stop till they find us or at least me" she started to pace around feeling panicked "Cas how are we going to fix this? there's no way to fix this their going to find me"  
Paige was becoming frustrated and turned and punched the wall without hurt her hand but she didn't care,the pain helped a little  
but it wasn't wanted to hit something else and turned back to the same wall prepared to punch it again.

At the sudden sound Castiel whirled around only to see Paige hitting the wall. As she prepared to strike again a inch before her hand had made contact with the wall Castiel's own hand covered her fist stopping it instantly. His sapphire gaze met hers before it traveled to her hand,  
looking at it as if in wonder as her fist seemed to fit perfectly in his… how strange… "I cannot die by mortal weapons, angels can die by the hands of other angels."he corrected before speaking again slowly lowering her hand to her side. "You need to calm yourself, right now your judgment is impaired and you are no good to any one in your present state."

Stepping away from her Castiel walked the perimeter of the small enclosure, it was only mid day and it seemed winter had finally come, the dark over cast skies gave the world around them a solemn glance making everything seem impossible. Closing his eyes he felt a draft throught the walls, feeling the cool air across his exposed skin. It didn't bother him but to a human it was a inch from freezing. Letting out a long breath that clouded the air Castiel spoke. "You have to accept there may be a chance that you will be caught Paige… and there will be nothing I will  
be able to do about it."  
There was a moment of silence as he stood in shadow and yet his tone could mirror his grave expression. "But I will stay  
with you for as long as I can."

Paige just stood there not moving and just sighed letting in all sink in "so pretty much this was all done for nothing..he's going to find me and everything will just start over" she whispered. She leaned against the wall and sank down.  
Paige could see it all in her head,her father's face and the pain that would fallow once they were behind closed let it all sink in farther and made a choice right then and there what she would do after she was caught and at was going to finally make it stop,she was going to kill herself.  
Paige stayed quiet and would not look at him in case he could see her plan's in her pulled her legs up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them resting her fore head against her knee's,The cold of the room started to make her shake.

Once a decision was made from his charge Castiel felt it, his head snapped in her direction so quickly it would have given  
most whiplash. She was going to end her life and now he felt the same. How was he to guard her if he was not to intervene? He didn't  
understand this… everything use to be so simple only now it seemed every choice led them down a more difficult path. Walking over to Paige, he shrugged out of the long tan trench coat and placed it over her.  
There were no words said as his hand rested on her shoulder longer then necessary. Could it have been this feeling he had  
been carrying around compassion? Perhaps…fondness for this human?


	8. Chapter 8

His thoughts were scattered as his head jerked to another side of the warehouse, he knew who it was long before he had seen her.  
Leaving Paige's side he stepped into the other room only to see Alison standing in the middle of the room.

"I am very disappointed in you Castiel."

Her tone was cold as she stepped forward. "You disobeyed my command to not interfere and now things have gotten out of  
hand."

Castiel looked behind him toward the other room were Paige was, unsure if she could hear the other voices coming from this room or not. His eyes met Alison's.  
"What purpose do I have if I cannot protect her?" He stated back until he paused and a cold chill raced threw his body.  
"No! I will not allow it."

"You have no choice and watch your tone Castiel." Suddenly the two seemed to face off.  
"You remember who can have you dragged back to heaven and another can replace you."

So that was it, all this time he was just leading the lamb to slaughter. It was her destiny for her to one day take her own life and her soul was hell bound. After the life she had lived, Castiel could not imagine it. "Why. Tell me." He demanded.

"God works in…"

"Don't you dare…" Castiel seethed

Alison's eyes narrowed. "You should show me more respect, Castiel. I have allowed you out of heaven but I can take you back."

The thought made Castiel still, thinking of leaving Paige almost felt like falling from grace. "How long?" His voice  
changed slightly.

"Unknown."

Lies, but Castiel didn't seem to push it as he looked down to the cracked concrete floor already knowing Alison was gone leaving him to stand defeated in the broken room. At the moment every ounce of him wanted to turn this structure into nothing but a pile of ash around him but the snap of a twig behind him caused Castiel to slowly turn and face who he knew was in the doorway. How could he tell this human the feeling even he didn't understand?

Paige stood there with his coat wrapped around her shoulders  
"Cas whats going on? who was that?"she had only seen the woman for second before she had seemed upset and she didn't know why which scared her slightly .  
She moved a little closer to see him better "are you in trouble or something?"she said feeling worried

Castiel didn't know how to answer he had not feel the reason to be dishonest but now he wasn't so sure. He felt her presence grow closer which made him feel only that much more ashamed for what was going to come to pass instead his head rose and his eyes met her gaze. "It was my superior."  
His voice sounded distant as if he was trying to place distance between them but for some reason he just didn't have the  
heart to do so.  
"I have fallen out of favor but it is nothing you need to worry about in our present condition we have more important  
maters to attend to."

"so there is like a chain of command for angel's?" Paige felt kinda bad "i don't want you to get into trouble with god or  
whoever because of me".  
She didn't like the thought of him being in had grown attached to him and did want to drag anyone else  
into her messed up stood there just looking at him for awhil"what do we need to do now" she said braking the silence

"Yes, There is a how you saw 'pecking order' but…" It was Castiel's turn to turn quiet at the mention of god. Breaking the eye contact he only shook his head. "Our father has not been in communications with us for centuries now." Walking over to the window Castiel at the moment  
weighted his options to what to do next, he had chosen this but some were deep he had already made up his mind about the whole situation. He would not allow Paige to be damned. He couldn't. "Its simple… we must keep you away from your father."

Paige was a little confused "I thought god talked with his angels all the time,at least that what my mother told me" She  
walked further into the room "i thought there was no real chance of me...not getting caught" she said quietly while pacing the started picking at the scabs on her left wrist deep in thought."you told me you couldn't interfere and with every cop in the state out looking for me its going to happen" she sighed "they'll find me..." Paige then stayed quiet

"I won't let them." Castiel suddenly snapped only to realize what he was saying and the truth Paige had spoken. He had been warned once,  
twice there would be serious consequences to his irrational actions. "I don't want for your blood to be on my hands, and I know if I allow them to take you…"  
The words caught in his throat as he looked to the skies. Everything use to be so simple, he could watch a thousand lives  
through the looking glass but it had taken only one to open his eyes and show him every human life has some meaning. "If you go back, you will die and if I interfere I will be killed…"  
There was no way around the ruling or the judgment.

"In all the centuries I have walked on this earth no human has ever made me feel the way you have… it's a sensation that intrigues and terrifies me all at the same time." Castiel didn't bare to look at her now as he spoke. "I will never feel like you only because I am not human… but I fear loosing you."

She couldn't look at him ether,she had never had someone care about her it always felt like everyone ether wanted  
her gone or use her like some kind of toy."I don't want to lose you ether but i'd rather i die then you" She walked over and stood next to him "When im caught don't bother with it Cas ok,i understand im going to die and i know how its going to happen.I'm just one person,nothing special but your an Angel you can help other people"  
She looked down at her hands  
"Just let whatever happens,happen don't get yourself killed over me" she said quietly

Never before had Castiel feel so torn between his orders and duty. Slowly turning to her his hand slowly reached out to  
take hers as he marveled in the simple touch. His eyes watched with fascination as he traced her skin almost like in the hotel. He would have killed for her, and he would do it in a angels breath but as she asked for this simple request he knew he would not be able to honor it. "No… you don't understand…" He whispered.


	9. Chapter 9

**I hope you guys like this, i'm really trying to fix my grammar problems. I'm actually in need of some help figuring out how to continue this story. I still have a couple more chapters to put up till i'm at my writers block part. If you think you can help please let me know.**

Paige felt confused "I guess i don't understand...i don't see why you even bother with me when you have a lot more you could do"Castiel made her feel important,his touch was soothing and gently nothing like she was use to.  
"Why risk death for me?" she whispered and looked up at him "Why risk anything?, like i said im just another human there are many others out there that you can help" she looked back down "plus my death will be quick my dad has a gun cabinet and i can except that but i can't except you dying over me...i-i care to much about you for you to have to die to save me ,that would be like a stab in the heart"Paige looked up at him again with a weak smile"You don't understand what i feel for you and im not sure i can explain it"

It was now Castiel's turn to feel confused, what else could he offer the world? To protect but not to intervene unless ordered what he was thinking now was enough to get him dragged back to heaven. It didn't sound like much to a human but to a angel it was one of the feared  
punishments. Still holding her hand in his, he looked to… seeing people like her kept his faith in man that they could do better, become better. His brothers and sisters did not understand this making him the one of reject if there was others they dared not say a word.

"God created us to serve, but with him gone things have changed… I see things that I think should not be." The truth was he was confused, doubt had clouded his judgment and he was looking to Paige for guidance but in the end he would have to choose for himself. His hands stilled in hers. "It will be worth the consequence if you live Paige. I see so much you can do for the world that I could never bring… not the way I am now."

Paige looked at him confused"what can i do to help the world? I'm a mess Cas you can see that.I'm barely able to help myself.." She took one of her hands out of his and pulled off her wrist band exposing every cut and scar  
"How can i help you,the world or whatever when i'm already broken?"

Castiel look to the scars that lined her forearms. His fingertips traced the scars knowing he would never scar like the waymortals did, but some scars didn't need to be seen to be there. "And yet you have still found a way to live." His voice was soft but he knew there was another reason he wanted her to live… she had to, he had never felt this way about anything or any one before. "I need you to live…" He didn't know why he had spoke his thoughts out loud at that he looked into her eyes and it seemed with out words he told her how he felt.

Paige looked back at him and finally understood what he was trying to smiled slightly at him "See i knew you had  
some kinda emotions under that solider angel shell" . Paige looked deeply in his eyes and knew she couldn't give up on him and took a firm grasp of Castiel's hands "Cas i'll live for you.." inside Paige felt hopeful that there was finally someone that really did care for her and wasn't  
just pretending or forced to" but whats going to happen now? won't your get in trouble with you superior? i thought you  
said they'd kill you if you interfered"

At her metaphor of a shell Castiel tilted his head lightly only to be distracted by the touch of her hands as they took  
his. She was going to fight for her life, if she was then he was going to do the same. Now it was a fight for both of them, Castiel knew they would come again and they may capture her but he was not going to leave her despite the consequences. "I have already interfered… there is nothing they can do at the moment but when the time comes know that you are not alone and I  
will return for you."

*your not alone*  
His words repeated in her head over and over in her head and she felt herself started to finally felt care for and  
loved which she hadn't felt since her mom was finally had a real reason to fight,to stay alive and it was all because of tried to fight it because she knew he wouldn't understand but she gave in and and walked forward wrapping her arms around him "I'm sorry if im freaking you out but i'm just happy that your here and that i can finally feel safe with someone" she whispered then wipped  
at her eyes trying to stop her tears

Castiel could feel the emotions coming off of Paige wave after wave until something seemed to change as he felt her body connect with his in a embrace that for a moment made him stiffen rather suddenly. He didn't understand this but looking down with her arms around him, he had seen it from humans countless time but had never experienced it first hand until now. His arms slowly and carefully moved to come around Paige as if she would break underneath his touch as his grip tightened only slightly. "You are not 'Freaking me out' this is quite… pleasant." He admitted feeling her body against his.

Paige laughed tho she still had tears on her cheeks "Well im glad me hugging you is pleasant"she pulled away a little an used the sleeve of his coat she was still wearing and wipped at her eye's and smiled up at him"i see im going to have to teach you about acting more human,i know your an Angel but right now you need to act human"


	10. Chapter 10

Tilting his head slightly. Acting more human? "Is that your way of making a joke, I still don't see human's humor." Even  
in fact he found that more of a insult then  
anything else but he doubted that she had meant it as such, as long as he still had her company he wouldn't mind to learn  
anything she taught him. But the question  
was how could a angel of the lord even remotely act like a human?

Paige stepped back "No its a joke Cas,see you act so...i guess soldier like,like you have little to no emotions at all"  
she put her hands up in warning  
"Don't get upset about that i understand your not human and human emotions don't come naturally to you but just like your  
helping me...i want to help you".  
She smiled at him and took one of his hands "See i care about you,that's an emotion right there and i expressed that by  
hugging you and telling you...  
do you understand?" Paige wasn't trying to be hurtful she just trying to be as helpful as she could "i just want you to  
understand about how its feels to be human  
so you can understand how i feel sometimes" she let his hand go "...i'm sorry if i'm forcing this on you,i don't want to  
change you" she looked down

At her comment as if on cue Castiel tilted his head ever so slightly trying to wrap his angelic mind around the concept of  
what she was trying to tell him about  
his lack of emotions. He listened carefully as she explained the emotion that came with a hug, care, this was going to be  
a little more difficult,  
maybe like teaching poetry to a gold fish… well maybe a tad more easier. As she looked down his hand came up to have her  
look at him as he stepped closer he  
looked rather nervous even for a angel as he wrapped his arms around her rather stiffly. "I care for you…" He spoke hoping  
those were the right words to say given  
in this situation.

She smiled "see its not so hard you just need to relax" she wrapped her arms around him too and laid her head gently on  
his chest.  
She stayed like that for awhile till she noticed she was getting tired "i'll tell you more tomorrow if you want me to but  
im getting really tired Cas"  
she pulled back and looked around "now where do i sleep this place doesn't really come with any kind bed...i guess the  
floor will work i'll just use my bag  
like a pillow" she smiled ay him a little "just please don't leave,i have this feeling your going to disappear on me"

Castiel couldn't explain the feeling he was experiencing as he felt her head suddenly rest against his chest. It was  
comforting in a way that he had never felt before.  
He tried to relax his body but for a start he didn't have a clue were to start. For her it seemed to come so naturally  
instead his arms stayed ridged like but his  
head lowered to rest on top of hers and in that moment he felt something else, he had no common reference to judge how he  
was feeling but he head heard humans call  
it affection toward the human that was now in his arms. Castiel's head rose once he felt her shift before he too looked  
around but found no place were she would be  
comfortable the next words surprised him. He looked down at her, his gaze could not help but travel the soft curves of her  
mouth or the life in her eyes it was all  
beautiful… "I'll stay with you…" he whispered as his hand came up to trace the line of her cheek to brush a piece of hair  
behind her ear.

Paige smiled an blushed a little at his touch,she looked up into his bright blue eyes and could just see so much understand in them.  
She surprised even herself when she leaned in and kissed him,  
then she pulled back quickly "i'm sorry Cas..i-i shouldn't have done that" she felt stupid for letting herself get so  
caught up in the moment.  
She couldn't even look at him now fearing he'd be upset at her "i left my bag in the other room,i'll go get it" she looked  
toward the doorway and started to leave.

Castiel's gaze watched the spread of crimson flush across her pale skin giving her a more exotic look about her that he had  
yet to understand,  
he was lost in her eyes looking into her very being that held nothing but a will to live and become something better then  
what life had dealt her.  
What came next Castiel felt spread throughout his entire body starting were her lips touched his vessels skin. As soon as  
it had begun it was over and she seemed to  
be cursing herself, what shouldn't she have done that was so horrible? His mind was trying to find the connection instead  
as she tried to leave his presence his  
hand reached out and gripped her arm pulling her back into his arms just as she had done kissing her on the spot only to  
feel the sensation again.  
His arms slowly wrapped around her, holding her close to his body as if in fear if he let go she would disappear. He knew  
this was wrong but in that moment he  
realized he had fallen in love with his charge and would do anything to protect her even if it was to give up all he had…  
all he was.

Paige was shocked when Castiel had taken her arm and pull her back to stood like stone when he had kissed her  
but started to relax as his arms wrapped  
around her,she let one hand just lay on his chest while the other held on to the top of his felt so at peace being  
right there in his arms.  
This was like nothing she had felt before but it was amazing,Paige had never let anyone get this close to had  
finally let someone break through the wall  
she had built around her heart..she loved tightened her grip on his arm to to be sure this was real an not just  
something she had dreamed up.  
Now she knew she had to fight to live an be stronger,she would fight as long as it took to just be with all hell  
brake loose before she would give up.

Castiel pulled away for only a moment allowing his forehead to rest against hers as he breathed taking in her scent as if  
to memorize every part of her.  
His arms still around her waist pulled her closer to were there was no space left between them. Feeling the warmth of her  
against his own vessel.  
She was someone worth fighting for and risking everything for. He had never felt like this and he was sure he would never  
again. He could feel the grip on his arm  
tighten making his heart nearly skip a beat at her touch, the side of his nose grazed against her temple as he whispered  
to her. "I won't leave you… not tonight… not ever."

Paige's heart jumped when he had pulled her closer to him,she took her hand an placed it on the side of his wanted  
to make sure this was all real,he felt to real to be something she was smiled at his words  
"As long as your sure about that..i'll fight or do whatever i need to,to be here.."  
she said looked up at him an looked deep into his eyes "I promise to live and fight for you...as long as your  
sure you will stay with me" she whispered  
an waited to see what he would fingers brushed against his cheek,it felt so nice to be with someone she was sure  
would never hurt feeling a sense of safety that was sure she would never have.

Feeling her soft hand against his cheek Castiel silently leaned into her touch as if to savor the sensations that roared  
threw him like the crashing of waves.  
So much had happened in only a matter of days, Castiel was sure what his purpose in life was, to serve and obey but Paige  
was brought into his life and he was willing  
to risk it all and the consequences didn't matter everything was falling into place until a voice from behind him caused  
him to whirl around placing Paige behind him.  
Alison stood only a few steps away, a slim silver blade in her hand.

From outside the roar of engines along with sirens surrounded the building Castiel felt the sudden surge of panic that his  
expression didn't show, turning behind him  
his eyes showed the fear that dared consume him. "Get out of here!" From his sleeve a sliver blade fell into his hand just  
as Alison had lunged forward, both blades  
clashed together sending sparks against the pressure of both.


	11. Chapter 11

Paige stood there frozen,her mind just trying to register what was going she remember this was the woman from  
earlier,his Superior and now this was the fight he had talked about. Soon she realized the sirens outside,she didn't want to leave him but that was his battle and now she had to deal with ran out of the room an to a back door that lead to the back of the building...but it was already to late the cops had  
covered the whole surrounding of the still tried to run even tho there was no where to hide.A cop tackled her to the ground and she fought as hard as she could but again the cop was he was forcing a pair of hand cuffs on her he yelled "Stop resisting! is the man you were with earlier in the building?"  
"Fuck you!" was her only answer to one cop waved over another to help him pick her up,then they looked at her  
"look is he in the building or not? there is no use hiding him"she wasn't going to give him up and like they could do  
anything to him any how.  
Plus she knew Castiel already had his hands full right now, she spit on of them "go fuck yourselves"  
the one cop tightened his grip on her arm causing her pain,she knew that was going to leave a bruise, the cop holding her got on his  
speaker "search the place from to to bottom the  
suspect must be in there" he looked at her "we'll find him" he waved to the other officer "just put her in the car,they  
already called her father just take her back to the station" it felt like her blood had run cold once she heard about her father waiting for her. Pagie was dragged and pushed in the back of a police car.  
She looked out the window and tears started to well up in her eyes *Cas please be ok...please help me* she thought

Both angels looked into one another eyes, neither backing down. "Is it really worth it Castiel?" Alison's words were cold  
before her fist connected against Castiel's jaw the force would have killed any mortal man instantly. His back hit the ground hard, scrambling back just in time to bring up his blade his low graveled voice held a deadly tone. "Some things are worth fighting for." Kicking her back Alison hit the far wall just as Castiel rose to hisfeet Alison was already back for only thing that could he heard was the clanging of the blades as they struck one another both were skilled and it could have takes days or months for one to even start to feel fatigued. Castiel was pushed into the open only from the corner of his eye just in time to see thepolice tackle Paige .

It was enough time for Castiel to be distracted and for Alison to sink the tip of the blade at least a inch deep over his heart before he was able to stop it.  
Pushing her away a angelic blue light glowed from the wound and the pain was nothing like Castiel had felt before,staggering back his knees buckled from underneath him as he looked up at Alison who only shook her head. "I'm sorry…" She poised her blade to strike for the final blow but before she could even make a move Castielshot up with the last burst of energy he had and plunged his dagger deep within the middle of her chest. "So am… I."  
Castiel pulled the bloody dagger back as he putdistance from himself and Alison as she fell the room was engulfed in the same light that now radiated from Castiel'swould from outside some police officers shielded their eyes almost thinking some sort of bomb had gone off, as it faded Alison's vessel lay were she had fallen with greatash wings that had been charred into the cement were splayed. Castiel didn't know how he felt at that moment, he had killed a sister… a superior and he would behunted for the rest of his eternal life untilhe was dead.

Looking down at his hand that was covering the wound blood flowed thick and red that was already starting to make a small  
pool at his feet, the sounds of the police now entering the building and another presence forming he knew it was another angel, he could do nothing for Paige not in his present state from the window he looked toward the cop car and in the back seat he could see the faint outline of Paige's form before he heard her bloody hand came to the window as he whispered to her very soul. "I will come… for you…" Castiel did the only thing he could do at the moment and was gone leaving the blood and body for the cops to find.

About two miles away there was a old cabin that had nearly been reclaimed by the earth as trees and other shrubs that wasgrowing deep within the woodland area the sudden fluttering of wings could be heard before a loud crash as Castiel hit the floor, he would heal but it would taketime and it was time he didn't have,crawling his way over to the side of the wall his bloody hand started to draw a enochian sigil, it was to hide him atleast for a while more or rather he hoped,if he was to fight again there would be no grantees he would make it back. The blood seemed to soak into the wall and whenhe was finished Castiel focused onbreathing the vision around his eyes started to dim before nothing but darkness consumed him.

Paige sat in the back of the cop car just scared out of her mind,she looked to the building as the cop car started to pull  
away and saw the flash of was even more panicked thinking that it was the end of Cas,but something inside her told her it wasn't, paige kept  
repeating in her head one thing Cas had told her *your not alone*  
It wasn't a very long ride back to the police station an once she saw the building her heart started to hammer in her cop stopped,parked and then opened her  
door,he pulled her out an kept a hard grip on her upper arm. they entered the building the cop sat her down in a chair  
and walked way. Paige kept her head down,her thoughts were racing *Cas please be ok...please* then her thoughts were interrupted by a voice she had hoped she'd never hear again.  
"Paige,thank god your ok you scared the hell out of me" she looked up at her father,she knew his act all to front of people he was the loving father,  
behind closed doors he was the devil. The same cop came up to her and took her hand cuffs off then looked to her father  
"you can take her home now...but i'd keep an eye on her"  
"I plan to office and thank you for your help" her father smiled at the cop then turned to Paige  
"lets go" he said blankly. Paige had no choice but to go with him so she just nodded her head and fallowed him out to the car.


	12. Chapter 12

**warning: this chapter has abuse and self harm in it**

**Attention: if chapter get re uploaded its because i'm really trying to fix my grammer**

It was a quiet ride home but it wasn't going to be quiet once they got home. Once parked in the drive way and the both got  
out,he looked around to see if anyone could  
see or hear him and then grabbed her arm and pushed her threw the front door and right into the living room. Paige made sure  
she never looked him in the eye,she learned that growing up.  
"ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND! DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH TROUBLE YOUR FUCKING ASS PUT ME THROUGH?"he screamed and pushed her into a wall. Paige said nothing cause no matter what she said it never mattered,he smacked her hard across the face, the hit brought tears to her eyes an left a red hand print on her cheek,he grabbed her by her hair an pulled her closer to him  
"THE COPS TOLD ME YOU WERE WITH SOME GUY,WHAT WERE YOU DOING WHORING YOURSELF?" He glared at her  
"no" she said in a whisper, he pushed her back into the corner an punched her in the chest knocking the wind out of her an  
making her fall to the floor "YOUR A FUCKING LAIR! YOU WERE OUT THERE WHORING YOU FUCKING ASS" he screamed then kicked her in the side, she laid on the floor for a minuet holding her side and trying to catch her breathe,tears streaming down her father bent down an grabbed her hair forcing her to look at him "get in your fucking room..an don't even try the window i already sealed it shut..if you even try to leave this house i swear you'll wish you were never born." he whispered then pushed her back to the wall.  
She hurried to get up and raced to her room "i'll be in there is a few minuets" she heard him say with a bit of a laugh  
before she closed her door.

Paige sat in the corner of her room crying her eyes out,she knew what was coming next and it scared her to the core. She tried to keep in mind that Castiel was out there somewhere and was going to help her but she couldn't keep her mind from telling her that he was ether dead or never coming back. She lifted her shirt to see the bruises she received from her father. Taking a deep breathe she went to her bed an searched under it for her box,finally finding it she opened it an pulled out one of the three razors she kept hidden tears still in her eyes she looked up to the sky *i'm sorry about this Cas...i need to do at least this* she pulled her wrist band off her left wrist an pulled the razor across her skin,she watched blood quickly rise to the surface and start to spill down her arm then she just continued with a couple more.

Castiel awoke with a start for a moment he was disoriented trying to piece together what had happened, he didn't have to  
wait long before the flood of the day's events flooded his memory. He wasn't ashamed to admit his older sister had really done a number on him as he sat up looking down the front of his shirt was covered in  
a crimson stain when he moved he could feel the pull of the flesh that was trying to desperately to heal, any other damage  
from any other weapon he would have already been on his feet. How long had he been out? A sudden panic suddenly filled him, ignoring the pain he rose to his feet, leaving the mark he had drawn on the wall others would be able to track him but it would be a risk he would have to take.

Within Paige's room a soft breeze lifted the scent of stale air as the light sound of flapping wings could be heard.  
Standing in the center of the room Castiel looked like he did when he had first met Paige, the blood was gone, the evidence of a fight long gone only the pale and dark edges around his features spoke of his battle, footsteps were silent and already seeing the bloody gashes on her wrist before she could make another he gripped her wrist holding the razor, his eyes met hers as he place a finger to his lips to silence her. Kneeling down despite his bodies protest. "Paige… this is not the answer…" He took the razor from her hand to set it aside before looking at the blood that covered her arm from the gashes she had inflicted upon the wounded arm carefully, bringing her palm up to his lips he placed a feather light kiss and the wounds were gone, as if they had never been. "We need to get out of here." his voice was quiet as his hand pushed back a strand of loose hair that fell around her face.

Paige looked at him in surprise tears still falling from her eyes "your really here?" she whispered reaching her hand out to touch his face. Her heart was just racing when she felt his face an realized she wasn't dreaming, then she remembered her father an looked at him with fear in her eyes "Cas there's no way out,he sealed the window..plus he'll be in here any minuet" she said in a panicked whisper then her door opened and the light turned on,there stood her father with a really pissed off look on his face."WHO ARE YOU?! AND HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET IN MY HOUSE?!" He picked up the only thing he could find to use as a weapon,a lunged at Castiel trying to hit him in the face with jumped up to try to stop him but he just pushed her out of his way an into the wall hard and fell to the floor

Castiel nodded softly, for once his features held a quality similar to a human softness feeling her touch against his skin,  
that fear of never seeing her again slowly faded hearing her hushed whisper Castiel was about to say something only to have  
the door burst open, standing to his feet he looked at the human with nothing but a anger only a angel could posses.  
The moment he touched Paige the house rattled and lighting flashed across the skies at the moment he wasn't concerned with  
his other brothers and sisters finding him, it was his duty to protect Paige and he would bring down the wrath of heaven upon this  
man's head. The lamp came out and shattered across his face and in the haste of the commotion the man seemed to still as he  
stood there and Castiel didn't even flinch at the action, no blood was split, the blow hadn't even caused him to stagger.  
Lighting flashed again this time on the walls great shadow like wings could be seen with every flash that seemed to  
flicker having them grow larger and larger with each passing moment until they were at their full glory. "I am an angel of  
the lord." his voice was deadly as Castiel slowly stepped forward. "You think your walls can keep me out you pathetic little insect?" Raising his hand the man  
suddenly looked like he had been jerked backward from a unseen force that caused him to crash right through the wall landing into the wall way. Castiel should have done thisa long time ago… the man would die.


End file.
